Once again, I love Buzzfeed. This video popped up on another friend's Facebook page this week and I immediately shared it on mine. For those of you just tuning in - I am an only child. And, there is a pretty high probability right now that Oliver will also be an only child. I'll talk more about that in an entirely different post, but I still wanted to share this video and just talk about the life of an only child.
Much of what is said in this video is SO true. And I've always felt as an only child, that only children get a bad reputation sometimes. Sure, I do believe that some parents of only children do spoil them and don't help them to learn about interaction with others and things of that nature. But I know in my case, my parents worked hard to not have that happen. Yes, I had opportunities and experiences that other kids my age maybe didn't get - this was the nature of having a family of three and therefore having less expense. My mom was able to stay home with me. We were able to take family vacations every year, including to places like Disney World. I ended up with a very unique and special relationship with my parents. But they most definitely did not give in to my every wish and desire. I remember specifically how badly I wanted an American Girl doll back in the day - they were expensive even then - and they would not let me have one because I used to mutilate my dolls hair by cutting their bangs, so they couldn't justify that money and watch me destroy it! I wanted a cat for years too and they wouldn't let that happen until I was old enough to help take care of it. So, they definitely did not just give me the sun and moon if I wanted it.
Often the response I get when people learn I am an only child is one of pity because I didn't have siblings to play with or grow up with. Yes I didn't have siblings to play with - but I have zillions of cousins (I am one of 38 grandchildren on my mom's side of the family) and three of them lived close enough that my aunt would bring them over every day in the summer, so I got the sibling experience with them. And I wouldn't trade the relationship I have with my parents for anything. And I'm quite close with some friends now that I am an adult that I definitely consider to be aunties to Oliver - not to mention I gained a sister-in-law when I married the Pants Monkey and she and I have a very good relationship too. So I don't feel that I'm lacking in that area.
Sure, I worry a little about the responsibilities that will fall to me as my parents age - but they are also fairly proactive and are planners - I think that there will be things in place before I have to worry too much. I hope to do the same for Ollie if indeed he is an only as well.
So anyway, I just wanted to share this, I certainly don't think less of those who grew up with siblings, but I guess what I'm trying to say is - don't feel bad for me, I like my life and I don't think I'm dooming my son to a life of horror if I don't give him a sibling either - but that's a story for another day entirely.
I don't think that there is anything wrong with be an only child. Granted I had the complete opposite experience as you (since I come from a family of 7 kids), but you aren't dooming Oliver to that either (heck our kids {hopefully mine will come soon} will be siblings since we are only having one)
ReplyDeletei think it's all relative. people with siblings might want to have more than one, and like you, one if perfect. there is nothing wrong with either way! me, i wanted to have 5 kids like my parents...until i had 2 and realized how hard 5 would be!!!
ReplyDeleteI watch my daughters work through their weekly bickering sessions and I thank God that I was an only child.
ReplyDeleteYay for onlys! ;)
ReplyDeleteI'm not an only child but I know those reactions of only children. I have known spoiled only children. I have also known spoiled kids with siblings. My cousins give their 2 children everything they ask for now. I know the 5 year old is behind on his letters and stuff. The parents were told to work with him more at home. They don't. Instead they take him to WWF Raw things (i am not sure if that's what it is even called. wrestling stuff)
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading this. Knowing you now as an adult, I know you weren't spoiled, a bad seed or irresponsible. Oliver is lucky to have you as his mom. You are a great lady, Beth. Ohhh and you look amazing for just giving birth 2 months ago. =)
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