I have been guilty of holding some grudges now and withholding some forgiveness in a situation I dealt with this summer. I had my feelings hurt by someone close to me, someone I used to look up to. They let me down and I had a hard time getting over it. From a healthy place now though, I'm ready to forgive, even forget a bit and move on. I don't know the path this person has been asked to walk in life, I don't know their battles. I'm offering this person grace and mercy and moving on.
I am also just so tired of negative, well for lack of better words, bullshit. There is so much negative BS around sometimes and it can get so easy to get bogged down in judging others, tearing them down so it makes yourself feel better. I don't want to do that anymore. I don't want my son growing up thinking it's ok to bash others behind their back. I may not agree with how someone chooses to live their life or handle a given situation, but you know what, it's their life, not mine. I wouldn't want them judging me. My mom and aunts and I have been rather fond of the Polish proverb "Not my circus, not my monkeys" lately - and that's where I'm at in terms of someone else and how they live their life.
Above all I just want to choose happiness. It's so much better than being bogged down with anger, resentment, sadness, etc. I'm choosing kindness. I am going to work on not judging, holding grudges or withholding forgiveness. I am going to simply STOP IT on negative behavior. Of course, it's easy to SAY you will do all those things, it's another thing all together to put it into practice. But I'm going to give it my best effort. I invite you all to do the same. Peace.
I just heard the "not my circus, not my monkeys" expression this summer, and it was a game changer for me... especially as I sit at home drinking my milk wondering how my replacement is handling my job and what sort of disaster will I return to. But there is enough time between now and then that I have to remember it's now her circus, and her monkeys. It's never easy to let something go -- whether it's a job, or whether it's a grudge. But it's much easier living a happy life once you do!
ReplyDelete{{hugs}} I'm with you on all of this!
ReplyDeleteGood for you for moving in a positive direction. I have always had issues holding on to grudges myself. I don't forgive easily. I'm trying to be more positive as well. It's pretty hard to break old habits. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteThis is such a wonderful post! I think that we need to be reminded of this often. It is hard to let go of things, especially with the hectic lives that we lead. I love how honest you are in this post, and congrats on working through that tough situation. You are already such a great mom, Oliver will grow up really awesome, just like his parents.
ReplyDeleteThis can be so hard to do... but good for you! I was in a similar situation earlier in the year, and honestly it has taken me up until August to fully forgive this person who hurt me. I mean, one of the closest people to me and I felt completely let down. I found myself saying things I didn't mean about that person behind their back and constantly being negative. I decided to stop... surround myself with the ones I love doing things I'm passionate about and love, and guess what?! I've been able to forgive and finally feel like I'm moving on. For me, the good news is this relationship is still in tact, in the past sometimes when these things happen it is letting go of someone close and still forgiving them so they aren't a weight on your mind. If you ever want to meet up for coffee and just have someone to talk to, let me know! I'm always down! :)
ReplyDeleteOh Bethie! I love this post. I love it for many reasons but for mainly hearing someone stand up and say they want to make a change for the better is always a great thing to feel as well as hear. I'm glad you are realizing the effects on your child. You know what? Your child will be kind and caring because you are kind and caring. Your goals will become his goals because you are his Mom (and Dad in turn, too) Thanks for this today. Today is WONDERFUL! When chemo is gone it is as if it never was never ever there. It is so odd how that works like it does. Odd but so true! Yup, and I already posted part of what I got on IG (take a peak) at Savers!!! Whawhooooo!!! ♥, Renae
ReplyDeleteI've never heard that saying before, but it's a great one! Lots of credit to you for embracing the positive and letting go of what's out of your control. I think everything listed in that quote you pinned are things that we would all be better people if we would follow all the time!
ReplyDeleteThis is how I try to live, but sometimes it really is hard! Especially when people have wronged you. But I think we're better in the end for doing it.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great way to live life...I wish we could all do it all the time! I love your Not my circus quote...
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